As a therapist, my days are often spent holding space for others—listening deeply, supporting emotional processing, and helping clients navigate the most difficult parts of their lives. It’s a role that is both meaningful and incredibly demanding. That’s why when the day comes to a close, my own self-care is not just a luxury—it’s a necessity.
After a workday filled with sessions, emotional attunement, and administrative tasks, carving out time to unwind is crucial. Without this intentional winding down, the emotional residue of the day can linger, impacting sleep, relationships, and even how we show up in our work the next day. A consistent nightly self-care routine is one of the best ways I maintain balance, reduce the risk of burnout, and create a sense of separation between my professional and personal life.
Why a Nightly Routine Matters A nightly routine is more than just a series of tasks—it’s a ritual that signals to our body and mind that we are transitioning from “doing” to “being.” For therapists and other helping professionals, this transition is especially important. Without it, the nervous system can remain activated, making it difficult to fall asleep, relax, or even enjoy the things we love. Regularly engaging in a soothing, familiar routine helps to regulate our internal state, promotes better sleep, and allows for emotional decompression.
Step 1: Greet the Ones I Love The first thing I do when I walk in the door is greet my partner and my fur babies. There’s something grounding and joy-filled about being welcomed home by wagging tails and the comfort of someone you love. It immediately brings me into the present moment. Before anything else, the dogs are fed and taken care of. It’s a small but important act of responsibility and love that sets the tone for the rest of the evening.
Step 2: Fuel My Body Dinner is truly the highlight of my day. After a full schedule of sessions, I’m usually hungry and ready to enjoy something comforting and nourishing. Most nights, that looks like cooking a meal at home, other nights we might order in. Either way, dinner is paired with an episode or two of a show I am are currently watching. It’s our time to connect and decompress.
Step 3: Sleep Prep Starts with Comfort Once dinner wraps up, it’s time to get cozy. I change into my most comfortable pajamas and head to the bathroom to start my bedtime routine. That includes some gentle skincare (nothing too fancy), removing my contacts, and brushing my teeth. These are the simple, grounding rituals that signal to my body that it’s almost time for rest.
Step 4: Creative Wind-Down If there’s still a little time before bed, we might throw on another episode of our show. During this time, I often reach for my coloring book. Yes, adult coloring books are a thing, and they’re incredible for relaxation. Coloring is a form of active meditation. It engages the mind just enough to distract from intrusive thoughts but is repetitive and soothing enough to promote calm. It’s a favorite part of my routine and a go-to for emotional regulation.
Step 5: Reading to Relax Once I finish coloring, it’s under the covers with a good book.
Reading is one of my favorite nighttime rituals. Right now, I’m diving into Killers of the Flower Moon—a gripping and eye-opening read. Reading helps me shift from the screen to something quieter and more introspective, easing the transition into sleep.
Step 6: Guided Meditation for Sleep When I start to feel drowsy, I set my book aside, place my phone on its charger, and begin my final ritual of the night: a progressive muscle relaxation (PMR) meditation. I use the Insight Timer app, which has thousands of guided meditations from creators around the world. It’s my favorite nighttime tool.
PMR is a technique that involves slowly tensing and then relaxing each muscle group in the body, usually starting from the feet and working your way up to the head. It helps bring awareness to physical tension and offers a structured way to release it. For someone who often experiences racing thoughts at night, this practice redirects focus from mental stress to physical sensation. It’s incredibly grounding and, for me, highly effective in promoting deep, restful sleep. I’m often asleep before the meditation is even over.
The Power of Routine While this routine may seem detailed, it doesn’t feel rigid. It’s flexible and evolves with my needs, but the core pieces—connection, nourishment, creativity, and rest—remain constant. As a therapist, my job requires emotional and mental availability, and I can only offer that when I’m taking care of myself first.
For anyone—therapist or not—a nightly routine can be a powerful way to honor your body and mind. It can be your space to reconnect, decompress, and prepare for the healing sleep your body deserves. Whether it includes a five-step skincare routine or just five quiet minutes with a meditation app, your nightly self-care matters.
And remember: taking care of yourself is not selfish—it’s essential.
